Last night at our youth group for the ladies Katie brought the goods and continued our conversation about what it means to buck conformity to this world and to find our identity in Christ. She really did well dealing with the truth that even those of us who have rebellious streaks and take pride in not conforming are doing just that by finding our identity in non-conformity. We all conform to something whether we like it or not. We talked about the fact that Jesus Christ didn't conform to the world because he understood his purpose and the way the Father loved him. He even chastised others for getting in the way of the will of the Father. At one point, we discussed why we feel the need to conform to this world. The answers varied from acceptance to belonging to the need for identity to the need for love. Katie dropped the bomb when she told us that the desire not to conform can become an idol in our lives. The desire to be different can be so powerful that we can put it above what God wants. "Kimmie, what if God doesn't want you to write anymore?" "Jaime what if God wanted you to give up singing?" "Niki, what if you couldn't wear black anymore?" "Katie what if God wanted you to dress like a prep and take 10 showers a day?" Gulp! Are any of us really willing to give up our identity for God. I think that in light of ministry, I would have to ask the same thing. I think that often those in ministry make idols out of their desire to be known as the pastor or the worship leader or the whatever. I know that often when I had positions of leadership and or ministry at Fuller I had a really hard time giving up my title and my desire to be seen as important and useful in that role. I think that many times that idol in my life led me to leave God out so that I could do what I "knew" was best. Man!! Looking back I had the opportunity to do a lot of damage. Praise God that he protected me as well as others from me.
Katie ended our discussion by talking about John 15:1-8 and the imagery of the true vine, the gardener, the branches and the fruit. It was cool to see the group (myself included) really come to study and understand the idea that for our own good and the good of others, God cuts off those branches that don't bear fruit. Sometimes that represents people and sometimes that represents parts of people. I think that for most, the analogy means to say that God in God's loving nature, lops off those parts of us that don't produce good and loving actions and ways. He lops them off so that we can't hurt ourselves and others. I pray that God would continue to go to town on me, lopping and sawing and trimming and clipping until I bear the kind of heavy, ripe and wonderful fruit that pleases God. Oooooh, art project for us girls: To bring in a picture of us and draw around a picture of our face the tree that we want to become. May be silly, but I'm visual. It could be a powerful reminder of who we are when we abide in Christ.
Tuesday, May 6, 2008
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"What Great Grief Has Made the Empress Mute" June Jordon - Poetess
Because it was raining outside the palace
Because there was no rain in her vicinity
Because people kept asking her questions
Because nobody ever asked her anything
Because marriage robbed her of her mother
Because she lost her daughters to the same tradition
Because her son laughed when she opened her mouth
Because he never delighted in anything she said
Because romance carried the rose inside of a fist
Because she hungered for the fragrance of the rose
Because the jewels of her life did not belong to her
Because the glow of gold and silk disguised her soul
Because nothing she could say could change the melted music of her space
Because the privilege of her misery was something she could not disgrace
Because no one could imagine reasons for her grief
Because her grief required no imagination
Because it was raining outside the palace
Because there was no rain in her vicinity
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